Wordless Wednesday-Heartbroken

 

Missing my Tazzie.

August 2000-March 15, 2013

{Capturing} Ordinary Life

Jenni Hufford posted this on her blog, and it is just PERFECT!

source

 I am looking forward to documenting my best moments that are my ordinary life with Project Life.  

 

100th Day of School

Happy New Year!

Graedon and I welcoming in 2013!  I love his expression.

The excitement and "clean slate" feeling of welcoming in a new year is something I look forward to after the craziness of Christmas.  It is so new and fresh, and it makes me want to conquer so much.  Now, I don't know how long this feeling normally lasts, but it is fun to live in the moment with it.  Maybe someone should ask me how I feel a month from now!  :)

 

I only have one main resolution or goal as I start 2013, and that is to speak kinder to my kids...I want to choose my words and not be so quick to snap at them or make them feel that I am not interested in what they have to say.  It has been something that has been weighing on my heart, and I am going to keep this goal in my mind everyday.  My boys are my world, and I want them to feel that from me.  

I have other small goals in mind, but this is the ONE that I want to write down and commit to with my whole heart.  My boys deserve the best of me (as well as my husband), and I know that I can do this.

Do you have any goals that you want to share?

There are no words...

Sadness

I cannot imagine facing such a horrible tragedy in my town, my school, my family.

Overwhelmed

So many lives, so much loss.

Grief

My grief is beyond comparison to what those families are feeling.

Safety

For my kids, teachers and my schools.

Protect

I must shield my kids.  I want to keep them in a bubble.

Thankful

For those teachers and staff that put their lives on the line for those sweet children.  

To have my own children safe at home with me.

For a gracious Father who called those 26 individuals home to dwell at His side.

My words are so small, just as I feel in the midst of what has happened.  

I shared with my boys about the tragedy that occurred in Newtown, CT.

I shared that we need to give thanks that we are all coming home to one another today, because there are currently families who cannot do that.

We prayed, we cried, and we loved one another.  

Feeling Displaced

Some of you may already know that last Monday, October 8th, I returned home from taking Gabe to the doctor around 11:30am to find that our home had been broken into.  My secure life was shaken to its core.  Our safe and loving home was destroyed by some broken individual(s) that felt the need to steal our belongings as well as our birth certificates and social security cards from our lock box.  I know that most things stolen were material posessions, but those belongings meant something to my family and me.  My camera along with all of my camera cards and my laptop that had my pictures downloaded onto it is something that I cannot replace.  My locket that had my sons' photos in it from when they were little cannot be replaced either.  I have had it over 9 years, and I am sure they do not make it anymore.  My JFK memorabilia from Chad as a Christmas present when we were dating was another stolen item.  So much was taken, and it just makes me so disheartened.  An act of robbery is not just one of stealing personal possessions, but it is of a higher magnitude in the damage that it causes.

We moved out of our home that same day.  I didn't know that Sunday, October 7th was going to be our last night in our home we had made together for almost 11 years.  Yes, we are moving, and we have been planning to move this month, but that was not the last memories that I was hoping to make in that home.  What a horrible feeling to have to endure, and I pray that my boys are okay, and they know that Chad and I will always protect them and keep them as safe as we can!  So, to those that robbed my family of our possessions, our safety and security, our last nights in our home-I will one day forgive you, but for now, you have accomplished what you set out to do.

Some layout sharing

I have actually been scrapping lately!  I wanted to share a few of the layouts that I have finished!

I Love My Boys

Wordless Wednesday

My story

I was out mailing my wedding invitations that September morning before I would head to my student job at Indiana State University.  I walked inside of the post office of my small town, and the postal worker was telling me that a plane had hit the World Trade Center in New York City.  I had made a comment about it being bombed not that long ago, and he agreed.  He said, "I don't know if I would want to visit those buildings."  I laughed and half-heartedly agreed.  I finished applying stamps on my invitations, and then got into my car and started on my 15 minute drive to work.  I was listening to the radio, and it was different.  I don't remember hearing that a second plane had hit, but I do remember the female DJ was upset on air.  I remember hearing, "they are attacking the Pentagon.  A plane hit the Pentagon."  That is when fear set in.  I got on my cell phone and called my finace (Chad), and my first words were, "I think we are being attacked!!"  As I am typing this, I am filled with that feeling again...chills throughout my body, and a sinking feeling in my stomach.  I don't remember much more of that conversation.  I remember being scared...scared because a chemical depot plant was only 30 miles North of where my family and I lived.  If we were seriously under attack, the VX nerve gas plant was surely on a "hit list." 

I arrived to work.  My student job was with the attorney for the university, and my work station was located at the ISU President's office known as Condit House.  I arrived to work, and everyone was gathered in the kitchen area watching the television.  We just stood there in silence, and watched as the South Tower collapsed.  We were all in utter disbelief and shock.  We stood and watched more as the North Tower collapsed not long after.  What do you say?  What do you do?  Everyone was just numb from disbelief!  Is this really happening?  I remember at one point I was sitting at my desk area and calling my mom.  I remember her telling me that we needed to find my brother.  I think there was just this overwhelming sense to find your family...hold close to those that you love the most.  Find them, tell them you love them, just hold on to a sense of "normal" life. 

I cannot imagine the fear that those in New York were feeling, especially not being able to find out right away if a family member made it or not.  The days after the initial attacks were so sad as we started to hear the stories of how everything unfolded that day.  I will never forget.  The feelings are just as raw now as they were that day 11 years ago.  That day really showed the evil that is in this world, but I know that so  many turned to Him on that day and continue to do so now.  Evil did not win, and I will never forget!