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Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Bedtime Advice Needed

It has been one of those days.
I am so frustrated with the older of my two boys, Gabe.
He is just being so difficult, especially when it comes to bedtime.  He just fights going to sleep.
He has even thrown fits to go to bed and has caused himself upset stomachs to go.
We've asked if he is afraid of anything, and he's not, at least he hasn't shared with us, and we ask him often about what is going on.
Now, we seem to have the fits under control, but he just tries to talk to us all night now.
The boys go upstairs for bed between 9-9:30.  Chad and I stay downstairs and have our time together.
Next thing we know, Gabe is asking us if he can take off his socks, if daddy is asleep, what if he has to go potty, etc, etc.
We just do not know what to do.
I have caught him awake well after 11pm at times, and we usually have to get angry with him before he will listen and try to go asleep.  I hate it that bedtime is such a negative time for us. 
We thought it was that he wasn't getting much attention from his daddy because this all started when Chad went away for a week for business in November. (this was his first business trip).
We thought maybe he was feeling insecure and that daddy wasn't around as much.
Well, Chad took Monday off of work and took just Gabe out to breakfast and took him to school and explained to Gabe that daddy was only home to be with him. 
Well, Monday night, he still misbehaved. 
Ughhh....I just don't know how to get through to him.
I would love advice or just reassurance that this too shall pass. 
It's just so discouraging because he was our good sleeper...his head would hit the pillow and he was out.

**He does have a night light, a flashlight, as well as the hall bathroom light is left on, so I am pretty sure it is not the dark.

1 comment:

Nancy said...

We used to have Aidan trained to go to bed and stay in bed and he would fall asleep by himself. About a year ago we moved Isaac out of our room and into Aidan's room. Out fear of waking Isaac up I started a very bad habit of laying down with Aidan until he went to sleep. This has been going on for a year. Sometimes I feel terribly guilty that I'm not doing the right thing, that he should fall asleep on his own, but I just don't want to go through the putting him back to bed crying thing because I know it will wake Isaac and I just can't take the stress of both of them awake, and trying to get them both to sleep. We currently put Isaac to bed about 30-60 minutes before Aidan which is about 7 pm. Then I go in and lay down with Aidan at 8pm. I get frustrated with myself for doing it, but I have the same problem as you..he will NOT go to sleep unless I lay down with him. Then he is usually out within 10 minutes. Sometimes I feel bad about it and other times I cherish the little talks we have as he's laying there falling asleep. I guess I don't really have good advice, but can relate to what you are going through. Do your boys share a room? I can't wait until my boys have separate rooms.

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